You will have to make sacrifice your happiness a little.
I have a friend who identifies as bi-gendered and often feels most comfortable in femme. Plus there's a niley_hott of things we didn't get taught growing up that are slowly coming out through the Internet.
I have had more than one girl, who I had definite chemsitry with, who the girl really liked me and we had deep and intense conversations as well as a real physichal connection to.
If this is someone you are to marry, then the rest will take care of itself.